Male Domestic Violence

Updated: Nov 11, 2019

How many men are affected?

According to research by the ManKind Initiative, 15 per cent of men aged 16 to 59 have experienced some sort of domestic abuse in their life - equivalent to 2.4million men.

That's 1 in 6 Men......

Though for every three victims of domestic abuse, only one of them will be male.

Mankind revealed that 4.3 per cent of men had experienced domestic abuse in 2016 to 2017, an estimated 713,000 men compared with 1.2 million women.

Less than one per cent of men had experienced physical violence from their partner, and an even smaller number believed they had been sexually abused.

In 2016 to 2017, 13 men are thought to have died at the hands of a partner or ex-partner.

Sadly, male victims are over three times as likely as women to keep their abuse a secret, or refuse to tell the police or medical professional.

Victims may have behavioural changes that can be vital signs of abuse

How can you spot the signs of a victim?

Sometimes it can be hard to tell what goes on behind closed doors, but many victims of abuse show tell-tale signs that could be vital in saving their lives.

The main warning signs fall into four categories: behaviour, appearance, contact and work.

Some of the signs of abuse include:

Appearing afraid or anxious to please a partner

Checking in often with their partner on their whereabouts or who they are with

Feeling threatened that his children might turn against him or be taken away from him

Talking frequently about a partner's jealous or angry behaviour

Having very low self esteem and feeling anxious or depressed

Showing major personality changes or withdrawing from people

Having frequent injuries with the excuse of an "accident"

Dressing in particular clothing to hide scars or marks

Having no access to social media and little access to money

Those trying to hide abuse may make excuses for injuries that could be a vital sign.

What can a victim do?

If a victim is in immediate danger, they should call 999 and alert the authorities of the abuse.

Otherwise, men can talk to the police, their GP, a local hospital or a specialist helpline such as ManKind

Initiative to get help leaving the relationship.

Keeping documents and logs in a diary which details the abuse in a safe place could later help tell others of the abuse.

What happened to Alex Skeel?

Alex Skeel was abused by his long-term partner who subjected him to physical injuries, starvation and isolation after her controlling behaviour escalated.

Alex was too afraid to tell anyone of the abuse for nine months, even though his former partner was using boiling water and knives against him.

His former partner, Jordan Worth, was the first woman in the UK to be convicted of male domestic abuse, and she has been sentenced to seven-and-a-half years in prison.

Around 1,000 men are raped every month

In a year when high profile male victims of sexual harassment, such as Terry Crews and Anthony Rapp, have come forward about their experiences, it's also worth shining a light on the fact that it isn't just women who suffer from sexual violence.

Brooklyn 99 star Terry Crews came forward earlier in the year about being sexually assaulted by a film executive at an industry event.

According to a 2017 crime survey by the ONS, in 2017 alone there were around 138,000 reports of sexual assaults against men that year. It's also likely this could be an underestimation due to men not coming forward about their assaults. The charity Rape Crisis found that every year, an average of around 1,000 men are raped every month in England and Wales alone.

This is a particular problem in the gay community. According to a survey from the Gay Men's Health Project 62pc of gay men have been groped without consent, and 30pc described themselves as a "a survivor of sexual assault, abuse or rape."

In addition, according to the Government's revenge porn helpline, around a quarter of victims of revenge porn (the sharing of explicit photos and images by an ex or current partner) are men. 

One in every five victims of forced marriage is a man, according to a report from ONS statistics

Shame.

Many victims of male domestic violence state they didn't tell anyone about their experiences as they felt

"Shame" as not "Being man enough" to deal with it, or not recognising it was Male Domestic Violence, or when the perpetrator was a woman feeling confused to the law in regards to self defence.

If you are a victim of domestic violence, you can call ManKind Initiative on 01823 334244.


If you feel as though Counselling, Life Coaching or attending a "Warrior Weekend" may help you please do not hesitate to contact me or please feel free to visit my men’s support group - MenDontTalk.Org


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